Does telling people your goals help or hurt?
It depends on what you share and who you share it with. One well-known study found that when people's identity goals were noticed by others, they then worked on them less, perhaps because the announcement felt like progress. Later research found the opposite when people shared a goal with someone whose opinion they valued and saw as more senior. So share specific plans with the right person, rather than broadcasting who you're about to become.
Zestasy Wiki: our reference answers. Checked for facts and sources; less curated than the magazine.
There are two popular pieces of advice, and they contradict each other. One says: announce your goal so people hold you to it. The other says: keep quiet, because talking about it is a substitute for doing it. Both have some research behind them, which is more interesting than it sounds.
The case for keeping quiet
In 2009, Peter Gollwitzer and colleagues published a set of studies in Psychological Science about "identity" goals: wanting to become a certain kind of person, such as a lawyer or a psychologist. They found that when other people noticed someone's intention to act on such a goal, that person then acted on it less intensively than people whose intentions went unnoticed. The effect showed up among people who were strongly committed to the goal, and one study suggested that being noticed gave people a premature sense of already having the identity.
In plain terms: telling everyone "I'm becoming a writer" can feel like a small step towards being one, which may take some pressure off actually writing.
The case for telling someone
A decade later, researchers at Ohio State led by Howard Klein looked at who you tell. As Ohio State News reported, people were more committed to a goal, and did better at it, when they shared it with someone they saw as higher in status than themselves. Telling someone they saw as lower in status, or telling nobody, didn't help. The researchers linked the effect to caring about how that person would judge them.
Putting them together
The two findings aren't as contradictory as they look. They studied different kinds of goals and different kinds of sharing. A practical reading:
- Be careful with identity announcements. "I'm going to be a runner" to a big audience may give you the good feeling early.
- Share specific plans, not identities. "I'm running the river loop on Tuesday and Thursday mornings" is concrete and checkable.
- Choose the listener. One person whose opinion you value, such as a coach, a mentor, a friend you respect, beats a hundred social-media likes.
- Share progress, not just intentions. Telling someone what you've done keeps the attention on action.
How to share a goal usefully
If you decide to tell someone, make it work:
- Pick one or two people whose opinion you care about.
- Be specific: what, when and how you'll know you did it.
- Agree a check-in: "I'll tell you how the first month went."
- Report back honestly, including the weeks that didn't go to plan.
That turns sharing into a small, friendly form of accountability rather than an announcement.
When to keep it to yourself
Some goals benefit from privacy, especially early on, when they're fragile and you're still working out whether you want them. It's fine to start quietly and tell people once there's something to show. Keeping promises to yourself without an audience is a skill of its own, covered in keeping promises to yourself.
FAQ
Should I post my goals on social media?
Broad announcements to a large audience are closest to the kind of sharing the 2009 study looked at. If you want accountability, one trusted person is likely to be more useful.
What if the person I tell is a peer, not a mentor?
The Ohio State work found the benefit with people participants saw as higher in status. A peer can still be good company and support, especially if you agree regular check-ins.
Does writing goals down count as telling someone?
Not in the same way. Writing a plan down is useful for clarity and doesn't involve an audience.
What if I've already told everyone?
No harm done. Shift the conversation from what you'll become to what you're doing this week, and keep the focus on action.
Sources
Written by the Zestasy editors. General information for curious adults, not medical, nutrition or training advice.